Have you heard?

In the general theme of gossip, we have the band, the show, and also the verb itself.

The band is great because their song "Fire with Fire" is my "Eye of the Tiger."

The show, Gossip Girl, is awesome in a mythical sense, like Paul Rudd.

And the act itself means that I have something to tell you. Not about celebrities or anything scandalous. I just wanted to say, have you heard of televisionwithoutpity.com? Just because, the recapper Jacob writes things every week that cause me to pause, and linger, and reread, to fully absorb the genius. In reference to Gossip Girl, Jacob writes:

"How being looked at means being responsible to the people looking at us, and how incredibly difficult and painful it is to retain your grip on anything real when every occasion is an occasion to be false, because it's drastically easier.
It doesn't matter if you're really perfect as long as everybody thinks you are; it doesn't matter if you're really happy, or a family, or good, as long as nobody sees the cracks. But what none of them can imagine -- and it is difficult -- even just one person, somewhere in a secret place, that would look you in your eyes and say they see the cracks and still don't care. That's the home they're all trying to create, for themselves and for each other, all the time -- that's all Dan is about, really; that's all Blair was saying when she said everybody knew how bad it was -- but it also comes back to this: being abject, dancing in freefall, is good. Those are the free places. But they're still not as good as owning the spot where you stand."


TelevisionWithoutPity.com Read more!

Project Runway: I'm Sorry, You're Out

Project Runway, you are officially demoted.

I rooted for you, I tried sticking up for you when you were dismissed as just another reality show. And I didn't give up on you throughout this lackluster season until last night.

Your former brilliance seems to have imploded into a black hole, stunning viewers with your absence of light, rather than the emergence of it.

What the hell, PR? I loved you. You presented challenges to the contestants, which we fans could engage with and evaluate; you judged fairly, promoted innovation and creativity, and allowed, most importantly, new talent to emerge unencumbered, bolstered by support and mentorship from the best in the industry. You were relevant, aware, and edited cleanly, without the more prevalent reality show penchant for melodrama.

And now? Now, even Tim and Heidi seem sick of this show. The challenges are rehashed, ridiculous, and seem to now focus not on challenging designers, but on challenging advertisers to come up with a new way to work product placement into every damn challenge.

Look, slumps happen. But PR is a caricature of itself now, without the meta-irony that allowed me to continue loving The OC until the end of television as we know, or the apocalypse, whichever comes first. The challenges and editing have been atrocious; whereas previous seasons slipped into sensationalism once or twice, this season, even the contestants seem to have been hand selected for their ability to create catchphrase and attention. Their ability to create fashion isn't remotely relevent, all of a sudden, because they aren't being asked much, and they are delivering even less. The aren't creating, they are getting by, and just barely. Last night, none of the dresses were impressive, and none of them were finished. On any other show, that would be odd, troublesome. On PR, it is inexcusable. (Thus, they are demoted.)

Previous seasons focused on rising to the challenge, pushing the norm, and executing the seemingly impossible. It was fun to watch because you found yourself wondering, How did they do that? And, how would I do that? The structure of the challenges was thoughtful, almost as fun as seeing how it would be interpreted. Now, we have straight-forward challenges that are met by Kenley complaining that they aren't suited to her or her abilities, and how it isn't fair. I eventually disliked one or two people each season--I have watched every episode of every season, with rapture and devotion typically reserved for religious fervor--but at least they were interesting, and usually very talented. Now, I can barely stay interested enough to hate the epitomy of all things needy and annoying, Kenley, who is nothing more than a self-important hipster cliche. Boooring. Show me a giant balding Quasimodo who writes hilarious original showtunes and delivers a pitch perfect, affectionate Tim Gunn impersonation while designing fresh, perfectly detailed designs, or an angsty recovering addict with neck tattoos and mohawked son who yells at moms and creates highly original, beautiful yellow plaid couture. They were assholes, but they had the talent to make it layered, intriguing asshole-ness, rather than annoying, go-away, Bettie Page wannabes.

Project Runway, in Intelligent Bang, its not one week you're in, and the next you're out. You pretty much have to take suckiness to new and shocking lows, which, congratulations, you did. I still love Heidi and Tim, though. Read more!

Work it Out

One good way to not feel guilty about watching TV is watching TV at the gym. Not saying you should feel guilty about watching TV. Quite the opposite, in fact--which, I suppose, means I advocate feeling TV about watching guilt? This is in situations where, after going to Catholic Mass, you decide to go to Best Buy. Or, in broader terms, feel proud for watching TV. Really.

But, if you do struggle with guilt for "zoning out" in front of the tube, the gym can really help eliminate it. You don't even have to work out, just show up in comfy clothes and sneakers, wander around, and then eventually gravitate toward a spot where you can safely watch the game while pretending to wait for the elliptical. You will look and almost feel like a person who worked out. And you can always zing people who accuse you of "sitting around watching TV" by pointing out that, A) you went to the gym and B) you were not "sitting" so much as standing.

OR, and this is my approach, watch it on the treadmill, going at a comfortable pace, the kind of strolling-with-a-friend-while-having-to-pee-and-get-to-a-restroom sort of pace, and watch four or five channels from suspended TVs, because things that are suspended are generally awesome, including, but not limited to, mobiles, glow in the dark stars, disco balls, and TVs. And I'm pretty sure watching TV this way makes you smarter, because you're not just watching TV, you are reading TV, thanks to closed captioning.

And reading TV can really be revelatory. For example,
commercials tend to have this sort of agenda. Like: they want to sell you things. Sometimes, they seem funny, or sweet, or both (I'm looking at you, Kaiser Permanente!) and you start feeling affection: I like this commercial, you think. It makes me smile. Which is why watching TV at the gym is really beneficial: when you read the captioning on the commercial, they pretty much spell it out. Its all, this product, that product, you need this. Like, I'm at the gym, totally on the treadmill, now is not the time, Carl's Jr!

NONETHELESS, not all commercials are bad (still looking at you, Kaiser! Thrive!) Some things that make me feel better, faster, stronger, and the opposite of guilty. (How I linked commercials to exercise is kind of a stretch...ha! Stretch! Get it?) Read more!